Over the past 10 years there has been a lot of focus on the issue of work-life balance.  As the speed of technology increases, so do the demands of doing more with less people and less resources, forcing people to work longer hours, and have much less work-life balance than they hope for.

I thought this was my problem too!  That was, until, I decided to go back to school for the year.  One of the first assignments we were asked to do prior to arriving on-campus in Victoria was to articulate something in your life/work that was causing a bit of a challenge for you.  I quickly decided my issue was work-life balance and I began to outline the struggle I face between maintaining a great career and an excellent life.  However, after my first week on-campus, I realized that I didn't have a work life balance at all, I had a life balance.

For so many of us, we mean different things to different people.  I am a mother, a sister, a spouse, a daughter, a co-worker, a manager, a teammate - the list goes on forever.  What I was forgetting on my list was the responsibility I had to myself.  I thought first of everyone else's needs of me, and placed myself on the back burner.

Being away from "normal life" for an entire week (albeit a learning vacuum), allowed me to get acquainted with myself all over again and let me tell you, I never realized how much I missed me (as weird as it is to say that).  Within a couple days, I was joking around and meeting new people.  The difference this time was that every new person I met, met me first - not my title, not my career, not my children or my spouse.  For once in a very long time I was just me - Jamie!

When I left Victoria and headed back home, I have to admit, I was a little sad.  Yes, I was excited to see my kids and wife, but I was afraid that once I stepped off that airplane, back in Halifax, the me I just rediscovered would disappear again.

Talk about your ah ha moments in life.  I now realize that responsibilities don't draft a person, relationships do, and the relationship we hold with our self is the greatest one of all (this is starting to sound like a bad Whitney Houston song, my apologies).  Since being home, I've committed more to me and have blocked out time for just "me" things.  Part of being me was the relationships I've held with friends that were unfortunately on the backburner because of my other responsibilities.  I am now making a concerted effort to spend more time with friends, and do things I like doing.

Leadership, like life, starts with the person.  If I want to be an effective leader, I have to be effective at being me as well - I believe this is what is called being authentic.  It is what builds character and at the end of the day, it defines who I am in this world.  At the end of my life I want to look back and be proud of the person I always wanted to be – myself – but that’s just my 4 cents.

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