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The DeVenney Code
Enjoy the unraveling of the business world's deepest darkest secrets from the comfort of your desk with “The DeVenney Code”. Michael’s opinions on both major and less covered business topics can be enlightening, refreshing, and humorous. Gain some perspective on topics that you may have never considered before, and challenge yourself to consistently “think outside the box”.
“The DeVenney Code” is your way to the inside scoop.
| Scowling Susie - It's All in the Body Language |
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Here is a thought - words alone only make up 7% of our communications. Amazingly, 55% of our impressions on others is based on their body language and a further 38% is based on the tone of their voice.
Actually, it isn't all that amazing. We've all been around those rays of sunshine that haunt our team or organization - the ones I politely call "Scowling Susie". When they enter the boardroom, they have the scowl already on their face and flop down in their chair with a loud painful sigh and cross their arms intensely. When someone starts speaking they roll their eyes, make grunts of disbelief or boredom, or actually turn to look at the window - while the person is actually talking! At times, they write little notes to the people seated next to them (not about lunch but negative comments about someone - the speaker, someone across the table, anyone really). Is this Grade Eight - no, it is most boardrooms in businesses. There are people who are just not happy with their lot in life - and believe it is everyone else's fault. They are victims because they will firmly tell you -endlessly - how much they have tried and people just don't understand and are against them. They pick people (like a hyena spotting the wounded buffalo) who actually will listen to them and then start to spread the poison - sharing their woes and injuries while building negativity. No offense, they are in every organization. I have "enjoyed" the experience personally. Everyone knows who they are as they take so much time from the organization in talking about how to deal with them, dealing with them, and being frustrated by them. Scowling Susie usually has potential but it is masked by bitterness - little things like serving their coffee last by chance is seen as a professional affront. They are the victims. At least that is the case in their minds. What I believe is that we are responsible for our own situations. Nothing is really that bad. If you have a terrible boss, horrible co-workers, or whatever else is against you - find another home! Staying and becoming bitter is just not worth it. Life is just not meant to be that bad. Crap has happened to me as well but it is what it is and you move on - not become bitter and blame everyone with the exception of the real problem ... you. At times, Scowling Susie can be amusing because you can play games ... mention anything and take bets on how there will be something wrong with it or what expression will result this time. But to be serious, Scowling Susie hurts your team and your business. In simple terms, they absorb so much time and energy it is simply a waste. Worse, they draw people into negativity and spread the pain building cliques. Some people get drawn in and then you develop team fractures and mistrust. Work slows down because people don't want to work with certain others and meetings become painful. It hurts the bottom line. My suggestion for Scowling Susie - get rid of this person. It is worth it. You can try to invest in reasoning and supporting the person to a better place but some people just can't get there. An old management adage is that if you have talked about someone's negativity in every meeting for three months there is no cure. Once you get these people out (and not be to sexist as it could be easily Bitter Barney who never got the promotion), the whole environment changes. People know that the team comes first and negativity will not be a part of the environment. Engagement lifts and results improve. Honestly, it sounds like Grade Eight but is a very real part of the business experience. Most leaders were ranked low in multi-rater assessments for not dealing with negative employees quickly enough. I know there are costs but I truly believe the cost of removing someone bitter and difficult is most often far lower than the cost of a fractured team and negativity. We all need a healthy dose of honest emotional intelligence training - how do others see us and how do our actions impact on others. You can be sixty and still not get it - we all need it. Start by understanding how you affect others and if you don't see it and life seems that bad think about a new setting - if it isn't working, make a change. It helps you - and everyone else around you. We have one life, work plays a huge and meaningful part of it, so as Tim Gunn on Project Runway always says, "Make it work." Just my opinion ... |
Hello Michael,
Interesting article. I couldn't agree more that negativity can hurt teams and organizations. I also agree that managers need to deal with negativity swiftly, setting clear standards and expectations, modelling the appropriate behaviours and ensuring accountability mechanisms are in place.
The piece for me that shows diligence and genuine concern for employees, but was not explicitly stated in your article is this: before getting "rid of this person", invest some time and energy into looking into the root of the negativity. Talking about their "...negativity every meeting for 3 months" may cover it -if that implies an exploration of what is driving the negativity. Far too often, the manager addresses the attitude/behaviour alone when the negativity is a by-product of a toxic work environment or the long term effect of being the target of a bully. This leads to the individual feeling further victimized. Much of the bullying literature shows th...